Saturday, February 18, 2012

Matter of Mole

Lying in bed - 

HRH: Ammi let's play a game
Me: Ok..
HRH (hiding under the duvet): I'm going to be a mole who lives in a burrow underground
Me: Ok...I want to be someone who lives above ground...so what animal should I be?
HRH: A rat?
Me: No thanks...I don't want to be a rat
HRH: A snake?
Me: Can you think of some nicer animals?
HRH: Ummm....
Me: I'll be a squirrel
HRH: Ok your name is Ms. Red the Squirrel
Me: Ok..what's your name?
HRH: I'm Mr. Mole.
Me: Alright....
HRH (climbing out of the duvet): Hi Ms. Red...how are you?
Me: Hi Mr. Mole..I'm fine thanks...how are things underground?
HRH: You need to congratulate me
Me: Why is that?
HRH: I am going to have 15 new babies!
Me: Oh..wow...that's a lot
HRH: Ok see you later (burrows back under duvet)
Me: See ya!
HRH (climbing back out a minute later): So I have 16 babies now. An even number.
Me: Wow...what are their names?
HRH: The girls are called Gertie and the boys are called Gary
Me: Why don't they have individual names?
HRH: It's easier for me to remember like this.

Monday, February 13, 2012

Birth, Bad Words, Body Parts & Underpants Secrets

HRH: If two people don't want to be married...can a child still be born?
Me: I'll tell you later.
-----
HRH: I got a new character in Temple Run..he's wearing a hat
Me: The next character we unlock should be the girl ok?
HRH: Ok...she's wearing a swimsuit thing
Me: Oh ok...never mind then
HRH: It's alright..she's wearing something at least.
-----
HRH: Why don't Taliban respect Allah?
Me: Why do you think they don't?
HRH: Cos Allah says to be nice and they're not
-----
HRH: A teacher in school said to all the kids 'I don't want to hear any bullshit.'
Me: What?? A teacher said that?
HRH: Ya so? You say it too
Me: Yes but I'm not a teacher and I try not to say it in front of you
HRH: It's ok..she didn't say it as crossly as you do
-----
HRH: I didn't know girls have such plump hearts..if someone comes charging at them, they would bounce off...like a trampoline
-----
HRH: I know a secret way of finding out people's ages
Me: How?
HRH: You take off their underpants
Me: Huh?
HRH: You know like my underwear says 6-7 years
-----
Tennis Takes (During the Australian Open 2012) -
HRH: 'Berdych' sounds like you are saying a bad word
HRH: I think Fed is feeling sleepy.
-----