Thursday, May 30, 2013

Exams, Elections Etc.

Post Urdu exam -
HRH: Hum awaz alfaz was in the exam too..one word we had to rhyme was 'hoily'.
Me: Hoily is not a word
HRH: Hay-wow-yay-laam-yay
Me: That's "haveli"
HRH: Oops..I wrote "boily".


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Urdu revision -
Me: Muzakar monus..Taya?
HRH: Tayi
Me: Chacha?
HRH: Chachi
Me: Abba?
HRH: Abbi


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Faisal and I playing FIFA and having to stop at 70 mins with score 1-0 -
Me: So I win!
Faisal: No the match didn't end so it's a draw.
Me: Don't be a sore loser
HRH: He's being like me.


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Eisa studying for English exam, getting startled by me entering room -
HRH: You scared me! I thought you were a troll...a big supernatural creature synonym giant.


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HRH: If you promise to get me a present it might help me behave better.

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Eisa and his friend hurling insults at each other in Mandarin (big horse; elephant etc) while laughing -
Me: Is that your friend?
HRH: More like a frenemy.


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Islamiat revision on 'Respect for Parents' chapter -
Me: What must we do if our parents are old?
HRH: If our parents are old we must get them new teeth.

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Survival instinct (post-elections) -
HRH: Today this boy in my class beat up someone because the other boy didn't like Imran Khan
Me: Did you tell him people can have different opinions?
HRH: No..I didn't want to get beaten up as well.

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HRH (excited): Tomorrow is the election! The madness will be over
Me: What madness?
HRH: You guys fighting all the time

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Eisa looking at pictures from last summer -
Me: What are you doing?
HRH: I am getting tears in my eyes looking at pictures of my childhood.

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Random HRH observations -
"In the morning when I wake up I taste like cat."
"Sometimes you can smell the boogers in your nose."
 
 
 

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HRH: From now on I want you to call me by my English name...Jesus.

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HRH: When I want you to say yes to something and you say 'We'll see', it always means 'No'....and when I want you to say no and you say "We'll see", it always means 'Yes'. It's not fair.

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Urdu revision -
Me: Make a sentence with 'toliyan'
HRH: Nahanay kay baad hum toliyan istamal kartay hain.

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Before school -
HRH: Why aren't the lights on?
Faisal: There's no electricity and the UPS is dead
HRH: Why is there no wifi signal on the iPad?
Faisal: Because the wifi router is also on UPS...now eat your breakfast.
HRH: I can't. I am also on UPS.

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HRH: I'm going to be a movie maker when I grow up..and I'll only make zombie movies
Me: But you are always too scared to watch horror films
HRH: Well I'll just make them...not watch them.

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HRH: I made up a joke..What's yellow and you put it on a hot dog and it's poop?
Me: Why would you put poop on a hot dog?
HRH: Mus-turd!

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Faisal bowling, ball hits Eisa -
HRH: Oww...that was a GBW...a Groin Before Wicket.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

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HRH: My friend was insulting someone today and said to him 'You do sex with a girl on a bed.'
Me: *horrified silence*


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Djoko v Murray..on a Djoko error -
HRH: Oiii..sala!
Me: Don't say that word
HRH: Why? What does it mean?
Me: I don't know...
HRH: If you don't know what it means, how do you know it's a bad word?


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English homework -
Me: You have to write an essay on "One great personality that you admire the most"...so who do you want to write about?
HRH: Me. I am very funny.


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Eisa eating fries with khala -
Khala: Be careful not to burn your mouth...they are really hot
HRH (with a wink): Hot like girls?


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HRH (staring at Faisal's deo): Baba you use Axe.
Faisal: Yeah..
HRH: So why doesn't Ammi say "Bow Chicka Wow Wow"?


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HRH: You know the groin kidneys..
Me: Groin kidneys? Kidneys are at the back..
HRH (pointing at front of pants): No these groin kidneys..in Wolverine, he kicks someone in the groin and then says "Try growing those back."


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Listening to Hips Don't Lie on the way to school -
Me: You know Shakira is Pique's girlfriend
HRH: Yuck! What a lover boy
Me: They all have girlfriends..even Messi has a girlfriend
HRH: Messi doesn't have a girlfriend..he has a wife..that's how he has a kid.


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Discussing Messi's injury -
HRH: He just has a bruised knee
Me: Yes but he has to have more tests because its a sensitive area
HRH: I thought the pee thing was the sensitive area.


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On the way back from school -
Me: Why are you so quiet?
HRH: I'm really worried
Me: About what?
HRH: That I'll never be able to play football for Barcelona...I don't know how to speak Spanish.


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Me (to Eisa): I love you more than anything in the whole world
HRH: I love you too..I love you more than I would a pet..if I had a pet.
Me: Umm..thanks?


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Eisa rushing to bathroom after school -
HRH: The teacher didn't let me go to pee during class...so now it's time for the lemonade of 400 years to come out.


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Faisal (to me and Eisa): Try not to fight when I'm gone
HRH (to me): You always start it.


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VIP movement behind us with police sirens blaring to get us plebs out of the way -
HRH: Where's the chor??
Me: In that black Mercedes between the police cars.


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Urdu homework -
Me: Sabzion kay naam bataain
HRH: Bhindi, baingan, gobi, Avari.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 


   

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